Finding your tribe – #togetherforchange

I recently wrote a social media post on the fourth anniversary of Henry’s funeral about how grateful I am to his two godfathers and his godmother for their incredible support in our darkest days, and especially at his funeral where they all took on central roles in the day in the least godparent-like activity you [...]

Why we do it

A few different things have happened this week that have me reflecting on topics such as language, the concerns of friends, why we talk about our babies that are no longer here, and society's understanding (or lack of understanding) of stillbirth and baby loss. So I wanted to try and verbalise my thoughts on these issues. [...]

Lollipop men are annoying…

Sometimes lollipop men get on my nerves. I drive a lot with work and often find myself sat waiting while a lollipop man (or woman…are they called Lollipop People now?) stops traffic for one mum and child when they’re still a hundred yards away. It particularly gets on my nerves when lollipop men stop traffic [...]

First steps to your ‘new normal’

It’s been a busy few days for Henry and I. Last Tuesday we were at Salford University as I was the first bereaved parent to be involved in their incredible bereavement simulation training days for student midwives. Effectively supporting bereaved parents is the biggest concern for virtually every single one of the many hundreds of [...]

Out of the mouths of babes

So after an unfortunate Saturday morning working in Blackpool (any Saturday mornings working are unfortunate, nothing against Blackpool!), it turned out that my sister-in-law Jodie and my wonderful niece Millie (not that Jodie's not wonderful too, of course) were also in Blackpool on a weekend trip. So I took the opportunity to go and hang [...]

But the world keeps turning…

So, two days after Henry's funeral, I was back at work. I'm lucky, I work in the healthcare industry - it's packed full of people who care, people who have compassion. So every customer I went to see, every hospital I got to, I was surrounded by love and support - and a special shout [...]

The days that followed – numbness and compassion

So how do you prepare yourself to walk out without your child, with just a memory box to help fill your empty arms? You can’t. Nothing can prepare you for that. We got home on that Sunday afternoon, and I can’t remember a thing about the rest of the day. We were both just numb, [...]

Two days to last a lifetime

Two days to make a lifetime of memories. I think I slept for about an hour, maybe two, that night, in a handful of short bursts. Briony was kept in the normal delivery room overnight for observation. I slept in fits and starts in the chair next to her, cuddling Henry, putting him back in [...]

Father’s day when your son isn’t here

I'm taking a break from walking you all through our journey in order today to say thanks to Facebook. Thanks tastecard. Thanks a lot Thorntons. Thanks a lot England Rugby. Thanks very much Village Hotels and the Foundry Project (the free pint DOES sound good though). Thanks a lot even the bloody Royal Horticultural Society [...]